I have been thinking a lot today about leadership. And the opposite - followership? The reason I keep thinking about it is that I recently read something about my star sign - I'm a Virgo - and it said that I'm a good follower. That's actually quite true. I can follow very well.
For some reason, though, I keep ending up in leadership roles. Being the leader feels like you've just painted a giant target on your chin.
When I walked my dog today, I never put him on his leash at all. We went on a pretty long and rigorous hike and he did very well. So well, in fact, that I think this leash-less-ness is going to continue. When he's on a leash, I think I'm the leader and he thinks he is and there is constant tension on the leash. One of us is always pulling the other. Without the leash, it's not that I'm a follower, in fact, more often he is behind me, but I'm not trying to be the leader and there is no tension.
Why is it that I keep putting myself Out There if it means adding extra tension to my life? As usual, I can blame my children. If I didn't want to take care of them in a way that I know they need me to, we'd all be just fine and I wouldn't have as many grey hairs. I just keep stepping up for them, which means I'm putting myself on the line.
I must say, though, at my age I've come to accept myself - especially the fact that I have flaws. I do what I do because that's who I am. I'm okay having a target on my chin if that's what it takes. I just don't want to be strapped to the top of someone's hood.