Tuesday, October 02, 2012

Spiders and Cake

If you really must know, I write the best posts in my head. And while it may look like I've been MIA, I've been very prolific in the ether.

Then, today, as I was making my coffee, a spider crawled into the water reservoir. It crawled out, then in again and back out. The vacuum was handy, but before I went for the vacuum, I noticed another similar - perhaps twin - spider crawling on the wall not six-inches from the coffee pot. They're gone now. May they rest in peace and come back next life as a cat and I will love them.

My husband has been taking care of the spiders on the outside of our home lately, and I haven't noticed as many inside. It's a pleasant surprise to realize that I don't know when the last time I encountered a spider was. Though, now that I think of it, I know when it happened.

The last time a spider crossed my path, the path was on my arm while I was in 99%-asleep-mode. I felt it crawling and I put my drowsy pincher-grasp on it and felt the heft of it as I threw it across the room. This was not a spindly cellar spider or an insignificant wisp of a thing. Nope, this was the size of a dime or a nickel with fatty legs. It was probably black and hairy, now that I think of it, too. Fortunately, I didn't see it and was asleep enough to deal with it without getting freaked out.

I think I wrote about this episode before, but it may have been in my head. Forgive the duplication if I'm boring you.

What I really meant to write about today, though, was the fact that I've lost nine-pounds. It's a long, boring story how it happened, but I decided to try Atkins. It has really changed my life. Not only is nine-pounds wow all on its own, but did you know that my pants don't fall down now? Yes, that's right, the roll of fat around my middle pushed my pants down (think apple) so I was constantly pulling them up. Now, however, they stay up because the middle isn't bigger than the under-middle. Yay!

Funny thing, though. I've lost nine-pounds and not a single person has noticed (besides my husband, who has been very supportive)! I see it missing from my face the most. I don't look as puffy or round as I used to and I can't believe that it isn't totally obvious to everyone.

In a completely unrelated side-story, I got my haircut today. I had really long hair then cut it to my shoulders and today I cut it to chin length. I love it. It's so me. And what I think is that now that I've cut my hair, people may notice that I've lost weight. We'll see. I've got more to go.

You may be wondering how I'm doing without all the sweets that I love. And that is a valid question. The answer is: I'm doing fine. We've had Hostess Donettes sitting on our counter for a few days and I haven't had a one. My only indulgences have been a slice of pie and two slices of cake on my birthday. In my defense, I shared the pie with my best friend and the cake was for my birthday!

I have more to say, of course, and I'll have to hold my tongue until the next entry...


Anonymous said...

Usually when you lose weight you lose it in your face first - confirmation you're well on your way! You can't spot reduce, thus nature cruelly chooses the face first.

On a more serious note: I've had inklings from your past writings, but now I have proof positive you are indeed a closet RACIST. I knew it! (I felt filthy just reading the above blog entry.)

To wit: in your own words... "It was probably black and hairy," as if a spider's skin color has anything to do with the situation...

I'd have phrased it more delicately..." It was probably a spider of color and hairy,"...

Upon further review you were just describing it's color: NEVER MIND.

ckh said...

Pretty strong words there, Anonymous!

Of all the spiders I've ever encountered, the black, thick-legged and hairy are the scariest - save one. And I say this not having experienced a Huntsman spider, which would scare the bejeezus out of me.

When I was in Korea, I came face-to-face with a giant green and yellow spider. It was the size of my face at face level. The benevolent green and yellow colors remind me now of a scary clown.

Anonymous said...